8 Jan 2011

Fantasy: Bondage 101

Category: Fantasy : Sex

I have to admit that this is not my thing (probably because I’m claustrophobic) but there’s a lot of guys out there that seem to like this practice of restraining a partner to a bed, posts, from ceilings etc.

For those of you who like me, are not very familiar with this practice, here are few things you should know :  

Bondage is not to be confused with the more specific practices of B&D, the practice of restraining and then dominating or humiliating a partner or S&M, the practice of hurting one’s patner in order to achieve sexual climax. Bondage enthousiasts generally prefer the more docile form. Porn sites usually blend all these practices in their content though, I guess bondage, B&D and S&M go well together…

Would you experiment ? Personally, I would not, even if I tend to like brutal tops… being tied up would freak  me out!

Feel free to leave a comment below…

(Follow the jump to see other nice images !  – I wouldn’t mind taking care of the top –  )

Dave

 

 

44 comments for Fantasy: Bondage 101

  • I have been restrained, tied down or tied up whatever you want to call it BUT only with a handful of guys over the years and they were people I had total trust in. Guys whom I knew would respect my limits and not go beyond my safe word with the exception of one. Having whoever was my partner there at the time, I’m sure gave me the confidence to do so.
    Meeting a stranger off the internet, whether it be A4A or another site and doing it…..no I couldn’t do it.
    I met a guy about 10 years ago who held me down and spanked me very hard. He was much stronger then me and had no regard or respect for my limits or safe word. That was a hard lesson learned because when he was done I was literally in tears crying. After 4 or 5 whacks across my butt he went crazy with dishing it out. Know the person well before committing to do anything like that.

  • Have not tried it but would be willing with the right guy !

  • I’m like Dave, I can’t handle being tied up or down. It just freaks me out. I have to be able to move at all times. Plus is there really anyone you can really trust these days to do this to you especially a stranger? I was married for 24 years and I tied my wife up a few times and had my way with her but I would not allow her to do the same to me. I have a friend that puts me in a sling but that is as far as I will let it go.

  • Last year for the first t ime i tied up my partner and enjoyed the senuall sounds coming from him. he was tied but i never forced him to do anything other than that. it was so hot. we did it a few more times after that u have to know ur partners limits

  • I have restrained bottom b4, but never did anything to hurt the bottom.

  • I know that we are males. . .and that sex is more important to us than it is to females (all males: gay, straight, or bi). The term “love making” doesn’t usually involve (but can and should more often) be involved when the sentence contains two males as the subjects of the phrase. Either way, I can fuck, get fucked. . .I can also be involved in love making. To tie me up is to use me as an object (which is a turn on to some – good for them) or to tie up is to use him as an object (again – good for them). Love making involves as many available limbs as possible. . .should we, as gay and bi men, promote “to tie up?”

  • key term Fantasy… I I’d love to do it, with someone or people I can trust with a stranger may people who practice it regurarly and not on my place… what I fear is that sometimes fantasies are meant to be just that when you do then it sometimes isn’t as hot as you thought it would be… but really come to think of it being tied up in a “safe” enviroment won’t be as hot as doing it with a complete stranger out of your safe zone, isn’t that what BDSM should be about letting yourself go and exploring yourself in the unknown… :-P

  • ok to watch others. kinda hot. however i don’t think i could ever let a guy get me in a position of helplesness. and i sure wouldn’t enjoy doing it to anyone i cared about. i’m a romantic type. a lover not a fighter.

  • I agree witht the trust comment 100%. I am a submissive bottom but will not be restrained until I know the person for a while. The few times I have been placed in bondage and used were intense. Loved every minute of my total submission.

  • First off let me say I am also claustrophobic, but the rush I get from bondage/S&M makes me forget all about it!! I have tried it and luv it!! For me it’s the ultimate in submission!! Relinquishing all power, all control to another man who can use “many types of force” on me IS the sex for me. IT is the transferring of ME to someone else AND I’m the classic Alpha Male when dressed and on my feet.

  • I’ve been in the bondage scene for over 14 yrs now, so I have quite a bit of experience. To some, bondage IS the scene, and for others (such as myself), it’s a tool; it’s just the START of the scene. I like to combine it with things like full rubber encasement, edging, breath control, mild cbt, etc. As for the top in the above pics, that’s Spencer Reed. He was my Dom when I did a shoot with BoundGods.com. (those pics are from a BG shoot). BG is a good example of bondage as a tool; they use it mainly to keep a sub from escaping the rather severe S&M that’s inflicted on them (my ass was bruised for almost two weeks after the brutal flogging I endured from Spencer!). But it just goes to show, bondage does not HAVE to equal PAIN, as many inexperienced in it seem to think!

  • I have tried this before as the submissive. I agree with Greg. I am an alpha male but find that it can be a rush to relinquish control to another person. Having said that I would emphasize that you should have talks with that person in advance to understand what you both are looking for. To meet with a stranger and not discussed limits could be very dangerous. Being blindfolded, ball-gagged and restrained spread eagle can heighten sensations and make light touching, slow stroking, etc more intense. Being kept on the edge of cumming but not controlling if you will be allowed to cum or how quickly you will cum is intense

  • I love to be tied down to the bed and used, wearing a hood with just a mouth opening and getting fucked by strangers I cant see….later tied up outside to trees and be discovered by horny males to take full advantage of my holes , my body, my mind…sexually used as a sexslave!

  • I have been a master since i was 18 yrs old and it is always essential to have a person who will respect ur decision to stop! That is why a safe word is put in to play, when you use that word ALL activity comes to an immediate STOP! To be a good master I had to first understand the dynamics behind being a slave. So for anyone wishing to experience the hand of the master… find me and you wont regret it!!!

  • Well, it’s all about trust as you know. I on the other hand prefer it when a bottom gives himself to me, no gimmicks, no toys. I may spank him, but just enough to get his hole hot for my dick. I don’t want him to worship the ropes or his feelings of abandonment.I want his concentration to be on my cock and I will make him cum through his ass.

  • Like Greg I have done it yes it sounds a little crazy and after we were done the two guys who did it to me even said they thought I was either brave or stupid because when I was restrained I could do nothing to make them stop but it was hott and I met one of the guys several times and had a ball every time!!

  • Remember John Wayne Gacy and Jeffrey Daimler

  • Bondage ? S&M ?

    Hell , I’d just like to get an old fashioned lay !

  • While I agree that 2 guys making love requires complete freedom for each to express their passion, I also find that on occasion, being completely restrained by a very trusted partner, and then subjected to others pleasure is also very hot. I’ve been restrained by a partner and repeatedly milked until I thought my balls were going to explode while he kept trying to get yet another load out. Amazingly after session, he untied me, snuggled with me and we ultimately ended up making love to each other with more passion than previously experiencned.
    Guess it’s all up to the individuals and situation.
    Enjoy :)~~~

  • I’ve never gone the whole way with BD but, without a doubt, the idea turns me on. The pics above are hotter than hell and I’d give anything to be the one bound up with a trustworthy top who would have his way with me. I’m primarily a top and feel strange about giving up my control but nevertheless very excited about the idea of it.

    I think my main interest is in being restrained and having no control. The humiliation aspect is not a turn on as is a pain aspect. A light spanking, some moderately tight ropes, some toys, and a butch guy really sounds great.

    So, how does one find a dungeon?

  • like most of you i think trust is important i am however looking for a good master to own my body i am a lover of good sex yes but i love to be brutally spanked , cried many times but never once used the safe word , i love it too much to spoil the guys fun as well , pain is part of the process no pain no gain ….any masters out there would like a bottom for life i aim to please

  • Been seeking a dungeon myself – usually private homes in US. See that CA has some that are for rent as well as some groups that hold “sessions”. New England here and have not been successful yet but still searching

    Try http://www.recon.com – you may find someone in your area with one…

    Good luck 2 you.

  • The first time I was ever tied up I did not think I would enjoy. However it was just the contrary, I found it to be a great turn on. I was restrained with handcuffs, ropes, a gag, and a spreader bar, and then paddled, until my ass was red hot on fire and then roughly fucked for several hours. I would absolutely do again I do not believe I am sadistic or anything. Hell yes it hurt some and the paddle left an imprint on my ass that said SLUT that was there for a week. I would absolutely do again, and again, given the oppurtunity, it was delicous.

    Blair_41 A4A

  • Thanks DaddyPJ. Got myself signed up and already have a couple of possibilities. Looks like my area (Tampa) has a good bit of interest.

    Thanks again.

  • i would like to say on this subject after reading 22 comments… even after dave explained the differences of bond B&D and SM people still arent understanding the difference. on the topic of love vs. lust i think you have to have both to make a good master/slaver relationship they have to know how to treat each other as for friend vs stranger i say that although stranger seems more fun how do you know that this person will respect you enough to use a condom if you look around on hook-up sites, you tend to find one commonality sub/btm and POZ often appear on the same profiles i say if you are a leather loving btm who isnt poz make sure your trash talkin top is trying to turn you tarnished im not saying every leather stud is + but i get tired of finding hot leather btms who end up being poz i have nothing against friends and emotionally connected +’s but sexually im paranoid anyways thats my bit on it othere than that i love the sensual bondage

  • I’m a naturally submissive guy and I love bondage because surrendering control to, preferably a dominant man, is completely hot to me. Being kept in some form or degree of bondage, at all times, is ideal to me.

  • I ENJOY BEING TIED UP -THE LOSS OF CONTROL – THE GIVING TO A TOP OF ONE’S FREEDOM THE TRUST EXPRESSED ETC- AND I THINK IT CROSSES EVERYONES MIND AT LEAST ONCE SO IT IS A RELEVANT SUBJECT. THE REASON I AM COMMENTING IS BECAUSE BAD THINGS CAN HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE-EVEN PEOPLE THAT LIKE BONDAGE CAN HAVE EXPERIENCES THAT ARE MALEVOLENT, UNSTATED, DISRESPECTFUL, PHYSICALLY BRUTAL, AND BAD. PERSONALLY I ONLY HAVE HAD ONE BED EXPERIENCE BUT FOR THE UNINITIATED TO THE BONDAGE SCENE OR NEWCOMER IT WOULD HAVE BEEN TRAUMATIC AND EITHER WAY CRIMINAL, SO NOT WANTING TO SENSATIONALIZE DETAILS THUS LURING SOME INTO THINGS CLOSER TAKE MY ADVICE -IF YOU JUST MET SOMEONE -DO NOT LET THEM DISABLE YOU BECAUSE THEY HAVE BOUND GAGGED TAPED ETC. YOU. EVEN IF THE GUY(S) ARE HOT AND IT IS YOUR MAIN FANTASY COME TO LIFE I CAN TELL YOU THAT QUICKLY AND WITHOUT WARNING IT CAN BECOME SOMETHING REALLY PAINFUL AND SCARY. WHEN YOU REALLY KNOW SOMEONE AND TRUST THEM AND YOU ARE IN YOUR OWN ENVIROMNMENT AND YOU HAVE TAKEN THE PRECAUTION OF TELLING A FRIEND THAT YOUR HAVING KINKY SEX -IF THEY DON’T GET A HEADS UP IN A FEW HOURS STOP BY, THEN GO SLOW AND ENJOY -JUST USE COMMON SENSE. IF YOU WONDER ABOUT IT IMAGINE YOU HAVING TO TELL THE INCIDENT TO A POLICE OFFICER -HOW WOULD IT SOUND. THANKS

  • I totally respect those who get too freaked out by being tied up. I personally can’t get enough of engaging in the act. Safety first, do it with someone who trust and can enjoy it with. NEVER with a stranger you just hooked up with. The act of being tied up is for me, the most erotic part. Feeling those ropes tighten against my legs and arms sends me over the edge. I feel that one can never use enough restraining items. I.E. rope, duct tape, chains, what ever works. Also the experimenting in different positions and being tied in various locations is half the fun. Here where I live not too many guy’s are willing to participate. I can never get enough bondage time in, but I am working on it!

  • Ive done some light bondage in the past but only as the Dom. I never could find somebody i felt i could trust enough to let them tie me up. When somebody ask me to tie them up or want to tie me up, I usually say no.Like others I to have been with too inexperienced or agressive guys that go past that safe zone. Hell if a guy even trys to put his arm around my neck i get freaked out. Ive had to literally throw guys off me because they missunderstood and thought i was getting off on it. Granted i do enjoy occasional smacks on the butt durring sex both giving and recieving, but not all guys do.So ask them if its ok. Comunication is the key to enjoyment and safety.

  • I have practiced many forms of bondage (most described above) both as a Top and Bottom. I have learned a few things (in addition to what’s been said. Particularly about trust).
    First: For some guys, it’s the being put in bondage that is the turn on. The gradual loss of control…(or the illusion that we actually have control of things) is what gets them hard. Once they are “there”, the trip begins to fade for them. For others, its “Get me restrained ASAP and then do all the things you want to me once I can’t resist”.
    For the first guy, gettting there is the process and for them, the eroticism is the process…it’s not a project.
    For the second type, the bondage is (as someone above put it,) “a starting point”.
    What they (and I) share is a sense of the power of ritual.
    Hentai (Japanese-style bondage using no knots!) is ideal for the first type of guy…it would drive the second type nuts. It takes practice…and practice to be adroit enough to get that think rope to hold without a knot, but the resluts are worth it. The best Hentai is “off balance”, not centered like or traditional tied-to-4-corners of the bed Western concept. It’s worth a try.
    Secondly, I find that many of the most ardent bondage enthusiasts are people who’s lives involve a great deal of responsibility, either personally or professionally. These are people who cannot choose not to do something. (An emergecy room doctor cannot say, I choose not to see patients tonight–its not an option). So, when the bondage is applied…and, now they truly cannot choose, they relax.
    It’s amazing to watch. What would cause many–and many of you here confirm this–to feel completely trapped and claustrophobic, for them is a sense of liberation, freedom and blissful relaxation.
    ONE FINAL WORD ABOUT TRUST: Much has been written about the bottom needing to establish some sense of trust in the top.
    But, from my exprience, the Top has to also trust trust the bottom. I’ve had botoms lie about their “experiences” with bondage–when in fact they had none–just because they were so hot to try it. RESULT: claustrophobia and panic.
    I tell potential bottoms: I am experienced at reading bodies, I know when you need to move or flex, but I cannot read your mind. And I don’t want to.
    It’s on the bottom to up front about his fantasies vs. his actual expereince. And even then, the most experienced bondage bottom may suddenly find the situation uncomfortable (for reasons of which even he may be unaware). Fortuantely, those guys have the life experience to let me know so the scene can adjourn…sometimes only briefly other times for good. But it’s always good to keep communication going. Believe it or not, even a blindfoldedm gagged and restrained guy can communicate with you if you’ve establshed the method before hand.
    Don’t want to keep you tied up any longer. Thanks for reading.

  • I’m a submissive and I certainly fantasize about be tied up and fucked all the time. I never felt I could trust someone enough however. Recently I have been servicing a dominant top that I wanted to try it with. When I suggested it he refused to tie me up because the last time he did that he wouldn’t stop and the bottom was hurting for a couple weeks. So even if you think you trust someone enough, be prepared for the consequences.

  • I’ve only dabbled with bondage & find it very erotic! Giving control to another is hot for me…(to a guy I know well and with a safe word) I love CBT and being bound while playmate plays roughly with my cock & balls and edging until I have an orgasm sends me into orbit! I wanna try more bondage…

  • Dude,
    I dont know you specify BnD or SnM BUT KNOTS tied by japanese M2M get me harder than chinese math.
    Bukkake anyone ?
    YUMMMM
    john

  • I have learned that not all bondage is about pain, depending on the situation–its mostly about control with little or no pain given… When we place a sub bttm in a sling, its about total control of their will & then their body. Wanna try?

  • I’ve recently started playing with a man that is in to numrous levels of fantacy. I have let him tie me up in the sling and work my ass really good, I must say it is all about TRUST. And setting the limitation word in place before you start. Its really hot to meet someone that is experienced and they are turned on to my enthuasism to experiment different things. Its bringing out things in me I never knew were there.

  • I let a guy tie me up when I was 18. Just suppose to me and him. I was also blind folded and force fed alcohol. 6 to 8 guys came out of another room and just all did what they wanted to me, no condoms used. I have herpes from it and anal warts.

  • i do light bons nerdage,flogging, is some one hasnt tried it before i always encourage them to have afreind or there partner to watch, so if the sub gets nervous he can hear his partners voice, but yes you have to trust the dominant person, well have fun guys and be safe.

  • There is nothing better than surrending to a lover and being pleasured while being restrained! If you havent tried it…give it a shot but only with someone you know and trust…it can be dangerous. Once you do it its hard going back to the boring vanilla stuff!! :)

  • That is the key in alot that guys do online on any site. You need to have total trust and need to spend some time with the person before you commit to being tied up and let someone else have the control. I Have been on the side of the ropes as far as being tied up, I am now the one that prefers to tie up, I get no pleasure out of hurting my partners, but I do get pleasure of having the control and knowing that I can do just about anything I want and if your tied up, there is nothing you can do about it. I, However, always respect the safe word, and look at my partner’s eyes and expression and know when to stop.

  • Bondage can be fun. However as most have said, its only enjoyable with people that you know and trust. I certainly wouldnt let anyone I didnt know do it with me. Me and my partner have participated in some lite bondage and it was very fun. Of course its not for everyone.

  • I realy like. The weadsite just not so sure about people sometimes people can be so fake up in here let get it real ,,,,

  • Never tried it but would love to try it one day with the right guy…

  • Never been tied up before then been fucked. In a way, it sounds really hot…like I couldn’t fight them off (as if I would want to…) I would NOT like the gag in the mouth though. Tie me up spread-eagle or tie me up in a sling…now that sounds erotic and fun!! :)

  • Love it, I had a guy at my place one night and wanted to be bound, so I took my broom stick and made him lay on his back and pull his knees to his chest, I then took the stick and placed it behind his knees and tied his legs to the stick with a few ties. I then tied his wrists to the outside of the stick so he couldn’t move his arms or hands I proceeded to tease his hole with toys and fingers till he was begging like a dog. I took some socks and stuffed his cock hole to muffle out the moans and slapped his exposed ass, finally I mounted him and edged his cock till he was going to cum, I pinched the head of his swollen cock like I was squeezing lemons. I made him go soft and did this for 30 mins. I finally pulled out of him and took my rubber off and came all over his cock. I jerked him off finally and pulled the sock from his mouth. He was short of breath . Thanked me , and untied him. And he dressed and left. Was hot, now I can’t get rid of him

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