I got an email from a guy telling me how concerned he was with the direction the gay community was headed. I asked him where it was headed and why all the concern.
He told me the gay community has lost its direction and was focused more on sex, drugs and the individual instead of the community as a whole. I told him I thought he was wrong. I explained to him that I thought he was looking at the gay community through his gay bubble. In his profile, he identified himself as a bear, in an open relationship with a husbear, he wasn’t looking for love, just FOB.
The gay community has always been a sexual one, the whole sexual revolution was based on sexual freedom and expression. We are men, we are sexual. While it may seem gay guys are focused on exploring their sexual freedom, there are plenty of gay couples in monogamous relationships who are extremely happy.
I have to admit that the drug thing was a big issue for the gay community, meth seemed to hit the community hard but again, there are plenty of gay guys who don’t know what staying up for three days is all about, sometimes I wish I didn’t.
Now the idea that a group of guys shouldn’t be allowed to identify themselves as how they wanted was beyond me. I myself don’t know if I fit in as an otter, muscle bear, bear or silver fox. It’s all so confusing but no matter how you identify yourself the underlying fact for all of us is that we are all gay. We are all a community. It’s ok to sit out of a pride parade or demonstration once in a while and go out and have a good time. Again, plenty of gay people in this world who just call themselves gay and have no idea what a husbear is.
I told him that being gay these days isn’t the big deal it was when we were younger. There is still a lot we need to do to maintain our rights as people but the big fight is over. We are mainstream now. They have gay alliances in high schools for Christ sake, you can even bring your boyfriend to prom.
What do you think? Is the gay community headed in the wrong direction or does living in a gay bubble cloud our vision?
g skorich aka eastvalley