Hi guys, I hope you had a wonderful weekend.
Today’s topic is a bit serious but so important.
I have few friends around me that are HIV positive and it brought me to want to learn more about it, learn more about them, their relationships, love, dating, sex. I asked them questions to find out that it was not easy for them to meet guys. And for my friends who are openly out about their status, it’s even harder even if they are all undetectable. They told me that as soon as they mention their status to a guy, some of them get automatically rejected. Only few seronegative guys seem to be “educated” enough on the subject to accept to go on a date and have sex with them. I say “educated'” because I think what makes people fear HIV postive guys, is thast they don’t know much about the virus and how controlled it is today with medications.
There are many myths about HIV and a good article I read last week was mentioning some of the biggest and I’d like to share some with you:
Did you know that positive guys on anti-HIV drugs reduces the risk of passing HIV to sex partners? Of course it is not 100% effective yet but the risk of infecting a partner is enormously reduced. A large international study looked at couples in which one partner was HIV positive and the other was HIV negative. The researchers found that if the positive partners took HIV medications to suppress their viral load (undetectable) the rate of HIV infection for the HIV negative partners was 96% lower if the positive partner was on ARVs. (source: http://www.va.gov/)
Statistically, you are far, far more at risk if you have unsafe sex with someone who doesn’t know their HIV status then someone who takes his medication religiously to keep is health on top!
-HIV and AIDS are the same thing
So many people think that they are the same thing or that HIV diagnosis is a death sentence. Sexual health charity Terrence Higgins Trust just did research of people living with HIV and this came out as the biggest myth, heard by 63% of them.
HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus) The virus will cause AIDS (Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome) if you don’t realize you are HIV positive and take treatment. This condition is when your immune system is destroyed, allowing other infections and cancers to kill you. But people who get diagnosed quickly will start treatment and never contract AIDS and will have a normal lifespan like everybody else.
-“I’m monogamous, so I’m not in danger!”
Hmmm, not quite! Sadly more gay men contracted HIV from their regular partner or boyfriend then do from having random sex with strangers. So it’s why always wearing a condom is your best line of defense.
-HIV positive guys are uneducated slutty whores
I personally know lot’s of POZ guys because I worked for Gay Pride organization here in Montreal and now work for A4A so I can tell you that they are the most amazing people I know. Imagine to learn that you are HIV positive and then live with it. For some, it was not even their fault, the condom broke, a boyfriend cheated on them, etc. but they still have to carry on living. It definitely made them stronger persons. Some are very active in the gay community, they respect others (because they want them to respect them), they are very “health oriented” and definitely very loving with their friends and family. Many of my friends who have HIV are professionals. Lawyers, ingineers, business owners, very successful people…so HIV is not only contracted by sex workers, it can be your best friend, your brother and your son. Show your love and support instead of hating:)
So after reading this, what do you say? Are you more open to date a positive guy? Are you less scared? Do you want to have more information?
I want to know guys if you are positive or negative (if you want to tell me of course) and if you have been in a relation with a positive man (or vice versa if you are positive).
If you are negative and refuse to date a positive men, I want to know why?
Thanks guys and have a wonderful day!