One of our members contacted me on A4A who wish to stay anonymous was asking this question. If you too would like to ask other members for their opinion on a subject, please feel free to send it to blog(at)adam4adam.com (replace “at” by @)
“Why is it so hard to find gay men who are not high on drugs or into drugs at all. Are there no ordinary guys who can enjoy life and sex without chemical inducement of any kind – poppers to crystal meth – ?”
I personally don’t like to take drug and I definitely don’t drink much so I am not the right person to answer, please comment below. Do you take drugs to have sex? Why?
(This post was sent to us by one of our members, it is the member’s opinion, not A4A’s opinion.)
I got into a heated on-line discussion about the trans-man who won the Mr. Gay Philadelphia. It seems like this person is calling himself a gay man yet still have women parts. I’m all for people being themselves but I seriously had to defend the fact that I like my men with a penis.
These persons can call themselves male, a man, a gay man, all they want but calling yourself a gay man means something different to other people. It means you are homosexual which in most basic terms means you are having sex with someone of the same sex.
I receive emails every week from members saying that they are having a hard time finding love because they are HIV positive. I am sure it is more complicated than for negative guys, but it is possible. Even around me I have a friend who is negative who dates a positive man. Why? Simply because he loves his partner and couldn’t care less about whether he is poz or neg.
It is true that many guys out there don’t know much about HIV transmission and how low the risks are when someone is on medication so they will categorically exclude positive men from being potential partners. I also think that many positive men exclude themselves by fear of being rejected. Some of you guys are in a serodiscordant relationship, you might be poz and your partner is neg or vice versa…so YES love is possible.
In the comment section below, I would like to hear you guys about this subject. Maybe give poz guys some tips on how to reveal their status to a partner or how to approach someone who is neg on A4A, or maybe encourage negative guys to look further than the status of a person or even share your own story. I think that this can be very helpful for everyone!
There’s a great article on POZ.com about serodiscordant couples sharing their experience, check it out
Have a great day guys!
If you’re not outgoing or eager for the spotlight, most of the time you’re considered awkward or pretentious. Being shy in the gay community can be one of the hardest things to deal with. Shyness is not always related to a lack of self-confidence, but it can be for these people. And trying to convince themselves that someone will like them for who they are can be a hard task. Because of this, they usually stay in their shell until they feel it is appropriate to talk.
Believe it or not, I’m a shy guy if I don’t feel 100% confident in a situation. Probably because of things that happened when I was younger. Whether it was my appearance that got me teased by others and left me alone without friends, or the fact that I was a gay boy who grew up in the 80s-90s at a time where it was not “ok” to be gay or because I was beaten up by my brother and dad…
(IMAGE: FRED W. MCDARRAH)
So yesterday’s post about LA Pride got few comments like ” Why the fuck do we need a parade? We can all marry in LA!” or “Why do gays have a parade in 2014, straights don’t have a parade?”.
Ok let’s do some education 101 here.
The parade has become a vehicle to showcase LGBT pride, a celebration, a manifestation of the “out-and-proud” mantra to put the lights on the LGBT community. But the history of the parade comes from less celebratory roots tied more towards political activism and protests.
On June 28, 1969, a riot broke out at the Stonewall Inn, a gay club in downtown Manhattan. Police had been known to raid the club from time to time, but on that night, the patrons fought back. A protest broke out, with police and community members clashing through the night, and for the rest of the week.